A CHRISTMAS STORY

'Twas the night before Christmas:

Christmas of '97 to be exact, and my mother had forgotten to get some Christmas jammies for me and my older sister. By the time she realized this, all of the stores were closed. 

So she got the genius idea to grab one of our old blankets from the closet and sew us up some robes out of it. 

After a few hours of hard labor, she finished and wrapped them up, just in time. On her account, she was actually pretty pleased with the makeshift job she did and so she proudly presented them to us.

My sister and I excitedly unwrapped them as fast as we could. 

The second we could see them, my sister lifted a corner of hers with two fingers and said, "What is it?" Just as I got a huge and genuine smile on my face and said in the most enthusiastic way I could, "RAGS!!!" 

My mom laughed so hard that she had tears, and my dad thought she was crying because they were ugly.

(Which they were. Sorry mom. But good job, though.)

And that is literally everything you need to know about me all wrapped up in one story. 

Merry Christmas, everybody.

Sincerely,

Jess

JUST SOME STUFF ABOUT ME

I'm going to tell you about myself.

I actually hate talking about myself. I get annoyingly uncomfortable when the conversation is directed on me and my life; but, somehow, writing it is easier. Is it possible for me to just direct people to this post when they ask about my life? Maybe I could fix up some QR code that I can pass around to potential suitors. I'll see if I can work on that.

1) I love lists. Lists make me feel organized. So naturally it's just going to have to be listed.

2) I hate it when things aren't organized or clean, but don't mind a little mess. I know that it makes no sense.

3) If I could describe myself in three words it would be a sarcastically sassy sweetheart.

4) I have a thing for alliterations.

5) My favorite compliment in the whole world is a compliment on my humor. I love to make people happy, and I always feel like I've done a good job at that if I can make them laugh. In my opinion, laughter is the most beautiful thing it the world.

6) I'm getting a little specific so I guess I'll broaden it out again. My name is Jessica Erin Walker. My initials spell JEW: fun fact.

7) I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

8) I have two loving parents, a married older sister who doubles as my best friend, an incredible brother-in-law, two rambunctious little brothers, and a darling little niece. I love them more than everything in the whole world combined. Even when I hate them, I love them.

9) I use too many adjectives.

10) I'm the wonderful age of twenty.

That's all. There's obviously more about me, but that'd be a little boring if I told you everything about me, right?

So see ya.

Sincerely,
Jess